Captain class amazon1/6/2024 ![]() ![]() Alas, no shouting ensues, and no ruthless plotting – or if it does, it happens off stage. His height and Rasputin beard give him the look of a tyrant in a film by Paul Thomas Anderson. When Josh Kroenke, an Arsenal director and the son of Stan Kroenke, whose sports-media conglomerate now owns the club, first lurched into view, I was hopeful. These are lucky young men, and they’re getting luckier, at least financially, minute-by-minute, hour-by-hour.Īs for big characters, there are none. How, we’re invited to wonder, will its players cope with the pressure? But though the fans are restless, the media is snarky and the forward Bukayo Saka can’t even visit his local Waitrose without the staff wanting selfies (and in a hoodie and a Covid mask, too!), it’s hard to worry for them. The producers make a lot of the fact that Arsenal’s squad, like its manager, is the youngest in the league. Even many non-football fans will know that Arsenal finished the 2021-22 season, which this series charts, fifth in the Premier League, a position that was something of a miracle given their rubbish start no one’s going to be on the edge of their seat watching them lose to Chelsea, to Manchester City, and even (a bit later) to Everton. The latter, inevitably, is a problem here. The second and third time you do, you begin to lose the will to live.īehind-the-scenes documentaries require two things for success: big characters and narrative drama, some heart-in-the-mouth jeopardy. ![]() Trust received, responsibility given and taken.”) The first time you see one, it’s (almost) hilarious. But his team talks, delivered with the help of a whiteboard and a magic marker, are pure, distilled David Brent. Yes, Arteta is obviously a nice guy, and very dishy, too, if I’m allowed to objectify him so outrageously he looks seriously good in his clothes, whether of red nylon or grey cashmere. Though I can’t be absolutely sure that All or Nothing: Arsenal is the most boring TV show I’ve seen this side of 2010, I will just quietly note that at one point – I believe Mikel Arteta, the club’s Spanish manager, was giving yet another of his morale-boosting talks – I did find myself doing a teeny bit of internet shopping on the side.
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